Upside of "the socials"

Recently, I witnessed one example of the few, and I mean FEW, benefits of social media.

I cleaned up some online stuff recently. Part of it was to get rid of a bunch of Facebook groups that no longer serve me.

As I was about to part with my "Aging Horsewomen" FB group (ouch, painful), I reflected on how important the group had been for decades. This was a group I turned to regularly and found inspiration, information, validation, support, and encouragement.

January 16, 2025, was the one-year anniversary since Dusty left the earth.

I have been missing his hugs and everything about his sweet soul. His loss has left a big hole.

I wrote a goodbye post, which is copied and pasted below, for my benefit more than anything. It's something I will cherish forever.

That post got over 1000 likes, and I lost track of the many supportive comments it received. As an expression of my gratitude to the group for their years of support, I hoped it would help others in the same position. Losing a horse, like any loss, can be extremely difficult.

This particular group has 69K members. SIXTY-NINE THOUSAND!

That is a lot of aging horse women.

Rarely did I see nasty, disparaging rhetoric, which is unlikely in a group that large. And if you know horsewomen, that's practically a MIRACLE! (Funny, but 1000% true...)

I have tremendous gratitude for the women in that "crazy horsewomen tribe" and for how welcoming and safe the platform was for me to turn to.

This is the upside of social media. Uplifting, positive, community-enhancing, heart-bridge-building across miles and screens. Those are a few of the limited redeeming qualities found online these days.

You can't find much else that's beneficial. There are hardly any absolute "truths" to be found. You look one thing up and can immediately see an opposing view that's validated just as strongly.

Cue the chaotic confusion......

Bullies, convoluted info, babbling, phony, lost, brokenness everywhere.

Dressed up in shiny, pretty, flashy packages.

It's a different world for my generation.

One that drives me to the beach, for sanity's sake.

In a world that often seems to be spinning out of control, to who knows where, it's imperative to find the positive and anchor in it.

I'm grateful for the pitfalls and peaks of my journey because they have led me back to my faith. But I need to keep returning to things that give hope and light, like gratitude, over and over again.

RIP Dusty-Do. A year of galloping through heaven...

I'll hold you close in my heart til we meet again.

Copy of post on (1) Judy Paglia | Facebook:

I know this isn't necessary, but I wanted to take a moment to post in this group and thank everyone as I'll be taking a long break indefinitely. And maybe offer comfort for anyone else in my position.

This group was pivotal to my mental state of health, among a million other things, as an aging horsewoman for years.

In 2021 we sold our farm because of COVID job loss. We moved to Florida with expectations of reaping fruits of our labor, and instead, basically lost my horses and had a second major riding accident that took the better part of a year to "heal" from. I am still dealing with issues to this day due to the injuries sustained.

I basically found myself in a position I never expected to be, especially so soon. I decided I needed to close the horse-focused chapter of my life.

Perhaps not forever, but who knows.

I am fine and have peace with the decision.

It took some doing, though. Took a lot of processing. Major soul searching. Horses had been my identity and my everything from age of six. And though I still love them, feel them in my blood, and carry their spirits in my heart, important facts became apparent, warranting the need to close the chapter.

Not all of this can be explained for others to understand. But it's what my soul is telling me.

I'm still healing from all the losses and need to take some time away. It's still hard to think of my last senior, Dusty, whom I lost a year ago. I can't even drive by horses without tearing up. The bitterness that still lingers for having to leave my farm can have a negative effect on my wellbeing at times.

That bitterness needs to dissipate. The pain needs to heal some more.

I am over the moon seeing others enjoy their horse-bonds and horse-worlds. But the remaining pain makes being around something I loved to be around hard to be around. If that makes sense.

It makes sense for me, and I suppose that's all that matters. It's gotten MUCH better and will keep getting better, but I need time to focus on the final parts of healing.

I wish all my fellow aging horsewomen the most beautiful rides off into their futures. I have immense gratitude for the friends I made here and the support that was boundless.

Perhaps someday I will be back in the saddle, but if it doesn't work out that way, I am good. I can look back at all the beautiful gifts I had when I was a horsewoman with incredible gratitude.

Much gratitude to everyone whoever offered and olive branch or a kind word.

One of the last pics of me and my sweet Dusty before he left this earth.